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              “生而不養,養而不教”,后果有多嚴重?

              作者:admin
              發布時間 2016年-04月-11日
              來源: 新啟航教育
              點擊:
              孩子一直在成長、在向前,而父母卻無法適應新的角色變換,始終原地踏步。父母不成長。
                   “成長痛”話題經久不衰,很多人在做了父母后對新身份的理解欠缺或偏狹,就導致了親子關系緊張,甚至使得孩子出現不該有的行為問題,究其原因,基本都在:孩子一直在成長、在向前,而父母卻無法適應新的角色變換,始終原地踏步。父母不成長。
                    保守估計,中國農村留守兒童超過6000萬,并且在日益增多。事實上,在城市中,這樣的留守兒童仍然大量存在。這些孩子的父母,有一大部分是出于經濟原因。但是,更多原因在于,這些年輕父母們沒有意識到自己身為父母的責任,或者只把自己當成了孩子的“取款機”,而不是父母。
                    我見過太多生而不養的父母。他們收入條件很不錯。僅僅是不愿意被孩子捆綁了自己的自由,就把襁褓中的孩子瀟灑地丟給老人撫養。很多人甚至分工做得還不錯。孩子的爺爺奶奶負責帶一段時間,然后孩子的姥姥姥爺再負責帶一段時間。這種不斷更換撫養人的方式,會給孩子的安全感建構,帶去更大的傷害。
                父母的職責其實沒有想象中那么復雜。首先作為孩子的第一監護人,父母自己要有基本的安全意識,并確保孩子的生命安全。其次,父母需要陪伴在側,尤其是孩子6歲之前,給予孩子身心發展必要的情感支持和引領。總之,不僅我們的人要在,心也要在。
                更多年輕父母有覺醒,我們的下一代才可能更加健康的成長。
               
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